Violence against women and reformation of the legal system

Hello Readers , fans and friends of succinct news. Today's topic of violence against women,  is one that I personally experienced in a society and legal system of double standard. This is a personal story and all the names and details will remain private. More of this topic will be included in my book titled "The truth about charities", when i ever find the time to start that project! Let me begin by giving you a "day in the life" snapshot. I'm no stranger to court or court proceedings and have been involved in many legal matters since a divorce in 1982. Well today, i was in court with someone that i don't know well but well enough to see a "victim" of a criminal assault. She, like me, was unprotected from physical assault , perpetuated by a man she knew, at least for a number of years. She is single, in her thirties and has had a number of relationships. She is employed and just making it in this bad economy. The last three relationships she has had exposed violent natures of the three men she was dating. There was financial hardship, there was shared addiction, there was dysfunction and there was "domestic" assault. All the assaults were initiated by the men. Let me edit this for your sake.  Let's say Ms. A, has an employment history with one company for a number of years. It offers her some security though she is now having medical issues. The men in her life are not "self-supporting". They go from one job to the next but have never really had success with financing themselves or women ,based on addiction and based on a serious recession. Today we are focused on Mr. Z. The third and most recent serious relationship for Ms. A.  Mr. Z , a number of months ago physically assaulted Ms. A while intoxicated and or on drugs.  I want to keep this simple so I will just say that Ms. A was a victim with serious injuries. Mr. Z it turns out , had a long history of violence with other women but was keeping this life secret from Ms. A. It turns out that Mr. Z owed many women "money" and that he was battling addiction for a long time. You will not be surprised to learn that Mr.Z also was arrested based on his physical assaults and even using a weapon in one case involving another woman. Mr Z is a classic case of system failure. He is realeased from jail and will find another "unsuspecting woman" with a kind heart , move in with her and start the violent pattern again. This was the case of Ms. A, who did have contact with this man in the past but had no "idea" or "information" that he was not the person he represented. Ms. A was totally fooled ! Well within the first few days of dating Mr. Z , he  was making promises of building a new home for Ms. A  and in general giving Ms. A the paradise treatment. He was saying all the right things and wanting to impress Ms. A who was naive and needy of a home.  In a whilwind of events, Mr. Z was working for a number of people as a construction laborer. He indeed, had connections in the town and with one landlord that needed several projects for his property managed and chose Mr. Z to take on these construction repairs.  One property was on "fire"  and this property was the  "rental" of Mr Z and owned by the same landlord that Mr. Z worked for.   In less than a few weeks, Mr Z was now homeless and moving in with Ms. A. The relationship was going fast forward and the same pattern with Mr. Z was being repeated. He was drinking and contacting other women the entire time he was "living" with Ms. A.  The relationship was violent in nature with added stresses that Mr. Z was facing including a daughter who was a minor child,  that was moving back to Florida and a son who was in a foster family. Mr. Z it seemed and his ex-wife had historical problems of unfitness and addiction.  Ms. A knew very little if anything about Mr. Z's former wife or his  long list of offenses committed to the "other women". Well today in court. again, i could see the "victim", Ms. A,  was a "victim" of double standard. Rather than rehabbing  Mr. Z , they wanted to "release" him early and have Ms. A a prisoner of fear. The threats that the legal system implied to my "almost" friend, were a crime on top of a crime. She spoke to a victims advocate but i could see, as an eyewitness, that the victims advocate did not hold the cards or the power to protect Ms. A.  A number of court dates have gone by
where Ms. A missed work. First of all she had a medical condition that was made worse by the assault of Mr. Z. She said her "ribs" were healing after being bruised for months. She was unable to go to a chiropractor based on having a pre-existing condition with her back. A chronic condition. So beyond the physical assault , Ms. A, suffered time lost from work, She suffered with a physical condition that needed medical attention but was not able to "sue" Mr. Z since he has no funds or insurance. Ms. A , moved into an apartment on her own and did all the renovation. Renovation that Mr.Z had promised to do for her. These renovations were very costly and are still on-going. With all this terrible meltdown and reality for Ms. A, along with shattered dreams,, Mr. Z is pressuring his legal representative, paid by tax payer dollars, to have him released early from jail. Ms. A's anxiety is through the roof no doubt and her health suffers based on her "memory" of the attack. She doesnt feel free in her own home and feels unsafe really every minute of the day. Ms. A needs the protection of the law but will she succeed. ?? So far the court has ordered a number of years as a sentence for this very serious assault that left Ms A badly bruised and with a neck and back injury. I am suggesting that Ms. A hold the line and get an atty. to protect her interests. It seems that Ms. A's rights have been thrown under the "bus". I mean this man has gone through his life , going from one woman to the next , taking innocence, money, and moving in , bringing violence and addiction to the relationship after making promises and cons. He is a "serial" attacker that must be stopped. The system again has diminished the crimes of Mr. Z and is ready to release him into the "public" without any support network or supervision. It seems to me that "violence" against women is being "rewarded" rather than punished. Mr. Z has been under the radar , living in california , the east coast, florida and other locations where he is repeating these crimes. I am a victim of physical assault by two police officers and as a victim , i can relate to Ms. A. It's like the legal system is designed for the "criminal" rather than the "victim" and this can really do damage to one's self-image.  One police officer, both males,  confessed to being on "steroids" and the other , who was just as violent , falsely reported "disorderly" and used "mace" over a "dmv" registration that was expired and was in my husbands name. Needless to say, I have never had substance abuse or addictions in my entire life and these physical "assaults" put fear in me and made my life dsyfunctional.  Not only my life but the life of my youngest child who witnessed both assaults and was damaged by the violent events .
these assaults also had damaging effects to my other children and my second husband. If people who are christian are not safe in their homes, where can they be safe? Or if officers of law enforcement are perpetuating crimes of violence on women and children, the violence in our society is already at a "fever pitch". My sons  academic study and homeschooling began to suffer and his child development was severely impacted.  It is a reality that our society has become more and more violent but the facts remain that it is the "men" perpetuating violence to "women and children". This is a sad state of affairs and i would suggest that the violence mirrors a deeper problem of "addiction" and "unfitness" with "lack of guidance" to the men who are dangerous and repeating crimes in more than one state with more than one woman. There is an epidemic of bullying that is also permeating our lives in the workplace and everywhere. The bullying is a form of "violence". It is typically threats made between children but often these children are living  in "unstable homes" deprived of positive role models. Or perhaps they are learning the violence due to absent parents or unfit parents. I always say "violence" is learned by children , just as love is learned. It is a learned behavior. Bullying is also a method unfit parents use and i've seen this all around me. The parent, bullies the child or threatens the child to exact a certain compliance. The child then misbehaves because good behavior is not rewarded. They only get attention when they are doing "bad deeds". The bullying parent lacks the communication skills or the "example" of love that a child needs and with "short fuses" , parents bully . In times of economic adversities the levels of stress on parents is extremely high with uncertainty and financial hardship .  These children from a lower socio-economic scale in turn bully siblings or others at school or wherever! Violence on tv and video games can be an added factor where parents are absent or working and a child is not properly supervised or with fit caregivers, watching excess violence on film or playing excess video games. There seems to be a loss of "nuclear" family that was god's order to protect children. The perfect balance and order.  Our society is undergoing extreme changes especially with an adverse economy, the loss of homes and jobs and pressures mounting daily. Families are literally being destroyed by addictions and violence. As a victim of police brutality and violence i can say that the system is failing women and children. There seems to be no "accountability" for the excesses of violent men or a legal system or prison system that is dedicated to reforming men.  Reforming means education and changing  the patterns and addictions that create more victims and a criminals dependency on the system.  These men, as in  Mr. Z"s case, are released into a jungle with no support system or finance. Many are unprepared for life from the beginning and should not be in any relationship until they are functional , meaning without addiction. They should also have a level of "academic standing" and be able to "finance" themselves without the "help" of innocent women who become victims "overnite".  There are no winners in this chaotic abuse cycle unless we can protect victims of domestic abuse or assaults by enforcing  a stiff sentence including "rehab" for the  perpetrator, The system must change.  There must be policies effected in the legal system that will make "repeat" offenders  adopt new strategies to prevent the "cycle" and be productive members of society once released. The system should not be rewarding abuse and violence against women. This is something I have personally witnessed starting with my college days while living  in a catholic commune. The men treated the women as property and subordinates. This is where the "double standard" started for me and why i left the catholic cult behind. If men have a "license" to abuse and never be accountable for their actions it ultimately forces women and children into roles as victims and without protection. If mothers or women are dependent on the finances of their "man" or "spouse", it is a never ending cycle of abuse.
Without naming statutes in this case,I can see that the "system" wants to put more women "at risk" by the early release of an offender. Even the victims advocate seems powerless to defend .  I can safely say that my energy is  reserved for "pro-life" and "prevention" causes. That is what i practice and preach. You can teach values in the home to your children that teach respect for life. You can teach your child patience and ethics that build character as well as support academic training in the home as fit parents who homeschool put the child first. The legal system seems completely at odds for the best interests of victims who are women or children.  While Mr. Z's actions were indefensible, Ms. A seems to find herself with these "violent" men and needs to take more care , do  background checks and manage her life without any relationship if the only available men are "violent" or have "histories" of violence. I would like to see Ms. A win this case based on the fact that she has already lost so much as a victim and one of many victims of Mr. Z.
Mr. Z should seek a new life without "women" or "relationships" until he can manage them because obviously , he could not manage anger and continues to struggle with the basics including "conquering" addiction.  Luckily Ms. A doesnt have children or this story would be even more tragic. I'm looking for outcomes that will be for Ms.A, justice and protection and for Mr. Z, a serious rehab that begins with "respect" for life including his own. Can someone change the "path" that Mr. Z is programmed to follow? I hope there is some counselor available that will "coach" him to some realistic code of ethics. I hope Mr. Z will not spend any more of his time or money on addiction and will recover his life! He is a victim of the system as much as Ms. A is a victim of Mr. Z !!!
This is detective spark , with a topic that is usually associated with "women" in other countries who suffer "cultural" discrimination. The women are not "accepted" as equals. In america , this should not be happening to women! Women should not be the "victims" of assault. In america women have equality or so we are told. This case is really in my grill because it is personal and theres no "excuse" for violence against women. Violence must be stopped.!
please enjoy our sponsors and visit us again, for controversial topics and some that will be sure to "capture" your attention.  The bible is clear about revenge.  "vengence is mine", "thus saith the lord".What about violence? Did jesus ever "model violence"?  When his enemies were all around him and his disciples were preparing to fight, his words were "peter, put down your sword". The power of the pen, is far greater than the sword and it is for me, one way of getting justice for crimes against women and children.  we can all start by doing something positive to stop violence.!! we can Start with the "man in the mirror". Try living a day without Bullying or resorting to anger. Use communication in a new way. A walk in the right direction will help. I always refer to WWJD? This is a good lesson for everyone facing excesses today. Always know the true identity of any you would invite to your home or relationship.
Don't forget to check into stage 13, going strong in the alps this week with the tdf, the test of endurance, the test of champions,. Congrats to all the stage winners.. allez allez... Its all about winning. !